People Getting Stabbed In Medieval Art Who Just Don’t Give a Damn

Medieval manuscripts were the imageboards of their day, full of murderous illustrations, however for some strange reason many people look as if they were bored with life anyway and their killer did them a service. Scroll down to see the funniest examples of medieval art where people are getting stabbed but just don’t give a damn.

He doesn't mind getting stabbed.

.

He doesn't mind being killed.

He's OK with being killed.

Whatever.

He doesn't mind being killed.

They don't mind being killed.

Not a single man in this battle mind being killed.

He doesn't mind being stabbed/

She doesn't mind getting stabbed.

Don't worry, she doesn't mind.

He just don't care about being murdered.

He just doesn't mind being killed.

They just don't mind being killed.

He doesn't mind being turned into an xBox.

He just doesn't mind being murdered.

He doesn't really mind being stabbed.

.

69 Comments

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  1. Janine November 27, 2018

    Poor person in Image 5 is not only being stabbed, but also hit on the head with a musical instrument!

  2. Cathy November 27, 2018

    Janine, he certainly has violins on his mind!

  3. Anonymous November 27, 2018

    I think it’s some kinda dispute between the Viol hat people and the weird dog-bird hat people?

  4. Anon November 27, 2018

    This is one of the best articles I’ve ever seen.

  5. William November 27, 2018

    Most of them are saints. They die for god. In that period it was against the Bible to picture humans. So they turned it into an almost cartoonist way of painting.

  6. Anonymous November 27, 2018

    In the medieval era people that were smiling with mortal wounds as showing that they are going to heaven and dont mind dying as the “christ” did serenely.

  7. Andy November 27, 2018

    Only a flesh wound…

  8. Anonymous November 27, 2018

    I agree with William and Anonymous above. In that time period it was a great honor to die for Our Lord God or Gods as in the case of Nordic peoples and Valhalla. So, in that light the artists rendering of the scene would knowingly depict the departing souls as rapturous in their departure. Pretty good article. Mostly, just the facts of the art presented.

  9. GizmoDuck November 27, 2018

    No, no! These were incredibly expressive representations of emotions from back then. You should have seen what they looked like when they weren’t being stabbed. Like they were eating salty sand, I tell ya.

  10. The Historian November 27, 2018

    @William (who said “In that period it was against the Bible to picture humans.”): WTF are you even talking about. That’s not how Medieval Christianity, or art, worked. Artists were absolutely allowed, religiously, to put people in art. They also made far more realistic statues. You must have gotten your Islamic and Medieval Christianity art history confused.

    Yes, most of these people portrayed are saints and it’s symbolism, but (a) not because Christians weren’t allowed to portray people in art realistically, and (b) that’s not the point of the joke.

  11. Anonymous November 27, 2018

    Had to look up the guy with the knife in his head. (Since he shows up twice.)

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_of_Verona

  12. Anonymous November 27, 2018

    “It only hurts when I laugh…”

  13. Vitor November 28, 2018

    “Se fizer cara feia vai ser pior…”

  14. Stephen November 28, 2018

    Shows just how ridiculous Religion really is .
    Just saying.

  15. Otto November 28, 2018

    I like the smiles on their faces – they must love it!
    S&M today is nothing what it used to be! Those Saints knew how to enjoy themselves!

  16. Anonymous November 28, 2018

    Next generations will laugh equally on today’s fatal selfie videos (if those videos will be still playable ona any device)

  17. Karen November 28, 2018

    May I die with such equanimity 🤣 Think a lot more meditation is needed first 😂

  18. Aria November 28, 2018

    I wonder… they seem to be stabbed in 3 places only
    The top of the head, the belly and this odd through the neck thingy
    I wonder if they ‘re – being all symbolic and all – places where you’re more likely to let God in as you journey towards the other dimension ….
    Because all monks seem to be killed with this cross on the head, being god s servants they have the “most chances” to reach there directly
    I’m sure someone covered this topic somewhere

  19. Lynn Drummond November 28, 2018

    Almost all of these people are smiling? Becket, is giving that “come on already, look, the male being stabbed by a outraged red headed spouse, is getting the ” don’t you talk about my cooking, look.

  20. Vega November 28, 2018

    #14 ” ur baptised my Child”

  21. Bob G November 28, 2018

    The old “sword through the neck” treatment looks particularly uncomfortable.

  22. Anonymous November 29, 2018

    In fact it never stopped !

  23. Oppenheimer December 1, 2018

    Some of them have a weird smile.

  24. Abraham Codpiece December 2, 2018

    The armoured knight picture is interesting, in that it seems to show that he has a spear or pole keeping his elbows behind his back which has made him defenceless, while his assailant is holding his sword by the blade, and using the cross guard to strike his captive.

  25. Anonymous December 2, 2018

    Parenting.

  26. Konbala December 3, 2018

    I think this is part of the reason why the original Diablo is so captivating, medieval is just so dark and interesting at the same time.

  27. Lynx December 4, 2018

    Man, I gotta practice my getting-stabbed-through-the-neck face so I don’t have a stupid look when the time comes.

  28. Gore Vidal December 4, 2018

    The worst was the “press of pike.” Look it up, but not if you’re planning on enjoying a kebab any time soon.

  29. Anonymous December 9, 2018

    They seem to be about to say “That’s all you got?”

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