The Funniest “Dog People vs. Cat People” Tweets

Religion and politics are thought to be the most explosive topics. But the differences don’t end there. We also have dog people and cat people. So roll up your sleeves, ’cause it’s about to get heavy…

Isn’t is weird how we have one million dog breeds and everyone is like “goldendoodle” this or “chihuahua mix” that and if you ask someone what type of cat they have it’s just like “an orange one”

U don’t hate cats u just cant handle rejection

The difference between dog people and cat people: dog people wish their dogs were people. Cat people wish they were cats.

People say "I love dogs b/c my cat would never pull me from a burning building," but my cat tries and fails every day to save me from the shower. What is he going to do? He weighs 8 pounds.

Dog people are like this dog costs $3000 and is hypoallergenic. Cat people are like I found this cat in an engine

dog people hate cats and cat people hate people

someone said cats are a lesson in consent and so many controlling people hate cats because they can't control them and i haven't stopped thinking about it since

I don’t believe anyone is exclusively a dog person or cat person because each animal serves its own important function. If you want a loyal friend who trust and loves you implicitly, get a dog. If you want to know where the ghosts in your house are, get a cat.

Dog person vs. cat person.

At least cat people and dog people can bond over how much they hate people people.

cat people: I like cats more but dogs are cool dog people: cats are the DEVIL !!! I had a cat once and it ATE MY GRANDMA

Dog people: My dog is my CHILD. Cat people: my cat is a fully grown adult human being that I invited to live with me and now is somehow in charge of my entire household.

Dog people always act like dogs are so much better than cats but as a cat person just wanna say that you never see cats working with the cops

Dog people: Fido is the goodest boy in the world and I love him. Cat people: Felix is a trash eating little hellspawn who sits on my face while sleep and Iove him.

Anyone: “h-“ Cat people: “People who don’t like cats only hate them because they’re scared of their power & fear their superior intelligence. They’re scared of an animal with independence unlike a fucking servile pathetic dog.” Cat: *gets tangled in the blind* x

"so are you more of a cat person or a dog person" how dare you make me choose. how dare you. this date is over and i'm calling the police

Dogs have owners, cats have staff.

[dog people] here’s my angel Rex! he knows 19 tricks & brings me my slippers every morning! [cat people] this is Princess Murder who lets me live with her.she pees on everything i love. her interests include screaming & eating bugs. when she asks me to kill for her i will say yes

People are always like CATS R ELITIST DOGS R THE PETS OF THE COMMON MAN but like 95% of cat acquisition stories are "I found him in the garbage and took him home"

You tell a dog person you had a traumatic experience with a dog & they bulldoze over it, forcing pics of their pet on you like immersive therapy. You tell a cat person a cat once fucked you up and they’re like yeah.

I am completely a dog person, but I do love the way cats give absolutely no fucks about anybody or anything else.  It's as if the entire universe has been constructed solely for cats - the rest of us just provide the food and entertainment

Dog people be like this dog was more expensive than my car. Cat people are this cat entered my house and now I belong to him

Growing up, we were led to believe that cats and dogs are mortal enemies, when really the rivalry is just between cat people and dog people.


 Add your comment
  1. Anonymous March 23, 2021

    I’m like.. meow

  2. Koizoh Rível March 23, 2021

    Love cats. Love dogs (but cats are better). Hate people. Especially dog people. Can’t stand well-adjusted.

  3. Tea March 24, 2021

    The first one slays me cuz it’s right on. No dog person ever wants to say they have a mutt. No, it’s a goldendoodle, etc. The only cat people I know who say stuff like that actually enter cat shows.

  4. Anonymous March 24, 2021

    I don’t like either cat people or dog people. I have both and love both, so I can’t put up with anyone who wants to make me pick a side

  5. Anonymous March 24, 2021

    @Tea – Not true. I’ve had two mutts and I’ve told people that many times.

    Dog breeds are different. Retrievers fetch, hounds howl, terriers bark and hunt in the yard. If I tell people my dog is a mutt and we think he’s a mix of a lab and maybe a golden retriever, that gives you an idea of what sort of personality he has. If a dog looks and acts like a lab, but he’s not a pure breed, people will just say he’s some kind of lab.

    Cats? I’ve seen a couple of unique breeds… but as far as personality goes, do breeds act differently?

  6. Koizoh Rível March 25, 2021

    @Anonymous – some cat breeds do standout due to their personality, yes. Siamese, for instance. In my opinion, though, the muttier the better.

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  8. Anonymous April 11, 2021

    Why are you doing this on a humor site?

  9. Anonymous May 26, 2021

    Bunnygirl definitely has a point about consent. Cats tend to make it very clear when you have gone past their boundaries and they don’t approve of even going near their boundaries. I have known cats that liked me better than they liked their owners–because I always associated with the cat on the cat’s terms, I didn’t try to push it at all.

  10. Killer cats June 1, 2021

    The ‘controlling people’ don’t like cats thing is pretty valid. I know this is only anecdotal, but I heard that years ago and have since tested the theory, yeah, they hate cats doing their own thing.

    They are the type that drag dogs rather than walk them & if you did that to a cat you’d end up in an emergency room with a cat that manages somehow to get into your locked up house to piss and shit on your bed every single day for the rest of your life. And don’t try moving house; it won’t help and will just makes them madder.

  11. suomynonA December 4, 2021

    Some of these made me crack up, but I don’t get the one by “plant daddy”. Was it supposed to be anti-cop?

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