The Last Blockbuster Store Is Still Alive, And Here Are It’s Funniest Tweets

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If you think that Blockbuster is dead after Netflix took over the market with their video streaming service, you’re wrong! The last Blockbuster store is still alive and is making everyone laugh with their hilarious tweets. Their Twitter account @LoneBlockbuster is actually run by a few of employees at the store in the Oak Park Shopping Center.

Please stop sending us photos of abandoned blockbusters. That's like us sending you photos of your dead grandparents.

A lot of people don't know this but we own a large portion of Netflix. Just kidding our electricity just got shut off.

Please stop dropping bibles down the Quickdrop return slot. God abandoned us long ago.

The bank took our intern.

Every time you return a tape without rewinding it a bald eagle flies into a plane engine.

Netflix doesn't even have any stores.

Unlike with Netflix, your Blockbuster accounts are 100% safe except for the time Darren was caught selling your credit card numbers.

Every time you throw out a VCR it ends up in a landfill and a raccoon eats the parts thinking it's food and dies. Just an FYI.

Listen, I get it. We all get the urge to stream films online (lord knows I do) but that doesn't mean we have to act on those urges.

Tomorrow and tomorrow only we will be forgiving all late fees as long as you bring in a written apology and give us one compliment.

Sometimes we'll get excited when cars pull into our lot but then it turns out they're just divorced parents passing along their children.

Due to the financial crisis, crying will no longer guarantee you a refund. We will reassess when things approve.

Can someone walk by the store and let us know if it's still there?

The Girl Scouts are blocking our entrance and when we asked them to move they called us "boomers" and told us to "start shopping for coffins.”

We may not be financially rich, but we're rich in available parking spaces.

Not to get religious but if you stream you're going to hell.

Help

Our New Years resolution is to survive. What's yours? Share it with us for a chance to win a keychain.

If old people would stop dying we would be fine.

We used to say "Be kind and rewind" but we're not in a position to be that polite anymore.

A great way to improve your Blockbuster experience is to lower your expectations.

Why is everyone leaving flowers on our sidewalk? Stop it.

Laugh all you want. We were here before you were born and we’ll be here after you die.

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4 Comments

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  1. Karl Hungus the cable guy June 7, 2021

    Brilliant

    15
  2. Anonymous June 8, 2021

    Love it

    2
  3. Anonymous June 10, 2021

    Bittersweet

    1
  4. Anonymous June 10, 2021

    I like the last one. I mean, it might be true they were here before we were born, but with the direction the world is going to, we will all be dead soon enough.

    2

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