Parents Tweeting About What Having a Teenager Feels Like

This post might strengthen your resolve to never have kids, or, if you already have them, made you laugh and feel like you’re not alone. Either way, scroll down and enjoy!

Will you empty the dishwasher please?

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.

My 15yo son told me he wants to see "Get Out" but since it's R-rated, he'll sneak in. Real gangstas tell their mommy their plan in advance.

Funny parenting tweet.

At the airport...

Shoutout to all the parents who're ruining their teens' life by making them wear weather appropriate clothing.

Just texted my teenager to remind me what Parental Control password I'd set & that she'd figured out, so I could get into my own Netflix.

According to my teenage sons the appropriate number of squirts of Axe Body Spray is somewhere between 38 and 579.

Can anyone recommend a good wine that pairs well with a teenager's shitty attitude?

Teen tried to make a dramatic exit by slamming my door, but there was a towel on the knob. No slam, & no dignity for her as I died laughing.


Be kind to strangers.

Son turned 13 yesterday.

Struggling teen.

Whenever my teen cleans his room, I get a brand new set of dishes.

Nothing makes me more nervous than a text from my teenage son that says, "How soon will you and mom be home?"

True that.

Before and after teens.

"My stomach hurts" is teenager for "I have a test in geometry".

How is it that my teenager feels free to scroll through my phone, check out my entire camera roll and read every last one of my text messages, but has a literal stroke if I make eye contact with her lock screen?

Spend quality time with your kids. Force them hold your hand and skip with you. Do this with your teens. Do it at the mall.


 Add your comment
  1. Apparent November 25, 2019

    I don’t have any teens. Where can I get one?

  2. Kniis November 25, 2019

    @Apparent: You can always just get a cat instead.

  3. Anonymous November 25, 2019

    Just stick to a cat

  4. PV November 25, 2019

    I got through 3 teenage boys. They’re all adults now which is good. However, by the time I finished with the third tern my hair was mostly gone. . . Any correlation?

  5. Mr Bleak November 26, 2019

    @Apparent Local schools will have plenty – but take a big net, they travel in packs.

  6. Thankful November 26, 2019

    Gawd bless all those reckless, hell bent people who are insane enough to have some of those little monsters

  7. Mary November 27, 2019

    Well, went you plan to pick him up a bit earlier from school, he got dentist appointment..and when he released is going to miss only 30 mins. Class…well…not going to dentist now, have to be morning appointment….Gosh…what’s in his brain ???

  8. Shemp November 27, 2019

    ^^^@Mary – Can you please translate that into English for us?

  9. Tony Luxton November 27, 2019

    @Shemp: I got this. I’ll ask her to translate.

    Mary, Bloggage from the grale beyonders, here. Sprinkly wise worms all tricklyhow in the earloders of the human specie. Gratifole to an anonyloppers living human beel for transcrile your worms.

  10. Mother of the Year November 27, 2019

    One of my teens hasn’t quite figured out teen rebellion yet. When I picked her up from school, she told me she refused to take a homework sheet that she was told to do. She was not thinking through that I would turn the car back around and take her back to get it. She apparently thought she had a winning argument to convince me how stupid the assignment was. She was so mad at me when we went back, but she had ratted herself out. Had she waited an hour to tell me, the school would have been closed and there would have been no way of getting it, lol. Teens are funny sometimes.

  11. jorge Espinha November 28, 2019

    I can’t wait . I have three boys. Just boys. Oldest is 11. I just can’t wait. I think I hated teenagers when I was a teenager. It’s going to be fine……

  12. Anonymous December 7, 2019

    Jorge, you’re lucky, the annoyance ratio is 5 to 1 girls to boys. The worry ratio is at least 8 to 1 and can go higher, depending on the girl.

  13. Anonymous February 22, 2020

    I’ve been teaching teens for 20 years.

  14. pamela February 22, 2020

    I always pretended I was going to inspect my teens room so would wrestle with him at the door till I was satisfied I had hugged him enough. Mums are sneaky

  15. J.H. February 22, 2020

    Oh my lord! I can relate! I had beautiful dark brown hair and then I raised 3 boys! My hair turned white during their teen years!

  16. Jan February 23, 2020

    My son is diabetic so I was careful to give him a decent packed lunch ….. which I sometimes discovered hidden under his bed rotting and once I found it in a bag on the tree outside his bedroom window where he had thrown it. Love him

  17. Anonymous February 23, 2020

    It’s been a year since my sons moved out (one moved out and one we had to kick out) and now both are doing okay, in their early 20’s. I am still so tired from their teen years I haven’t opened the door to their rooms which they left pretty trashed. But we did find all of our missing dishes in the guitar case one of them left. (We had to throw the entire mess away).

  18. LouAnne February 23, 2020

    Please I take a teenager my kids are grown and they are both pains in the ass sigh

  19. Anonymous February 23, 2020

    Son says to mom at the mall, mom can you walk about 25 feet ahead of me so that my friends don’t know that you’re with me.

  20. Anonymous February 24, 2020

    Well, the teenage years really make you Appreciate grown up kids. Mine are busy being extra nice as they realize what we went through.

  21. Anonymous February 24, 2020

    Teenagers are GOD’s real life birth control. You really don’t want to do that again!

  22. Deb March 1, 2020

    Jorge, start stocking up on food now. Best advice I can give you.

  23. Anonymous March 24, 2020

    This isn’t fair for teens, plus it’s just an annoying stereotype that makes people think that just because someone is a certain age they can predict every single thing that they’re going to do.
    People should have more respect (especially because teens are the ones that will choose what type of old folks home the older generations are going to end up in)

  24. Anonymous April 1, 2020

    Lol some of these were funny but I wish that people would give teens the respect they deserve… the respect that everyone deserves… some respect at all???

  25. David (never Dave) July 7, 2020

    The key to raising adventurous, healthy, and generally nice teenagers is to change your response to their requests from “Why?” to “Why not?” Take a chance. Allowing them to fail can be some of the best lessons you can give. They may just find their passion. The best parents risk losing just enough control to allow their children to live their best lives. Encourage them to try new things, celebrate when they succeed, and be there for them when they fail. It’s a win-win!
    Obviously, I’m not talking about beginning a burgeoning heroin addiction or wildly unsafe lifestyle here, but if your teenage son wants to get something pierced, or your teenage daughter wants to dye their hair bright blue (or vice-versa), support their risk-taking. Let them know that whatever happens, they can always be easily written out of the will.

    Just Kidding. Let them know you’re there for them no matter what.

    With love,
    A Father of 3 now-adults

  26. Anonymous July 28, 2021

    Teenage boys are better than teenage girls because when upset, teenage boys will sulk and go to their room.

    That’s what’s called a ‘self correcting problem’

    Teenage girls, when upset what to share their problems with you

    Who needs that

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