Parents Tweeting About What Having a Teenager Feels Like

This post might strengthen your resolve to never have kids, or, if you already have them, made you laugh and feel like you’re not alone. Either way, scroll down and enjoy!

Will you empty the dishwasher please?

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When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.

My 15yo son told me he wants to see "Get Out" but since it's R-rated, he'll sneak in. Real gangstas tell their mommy their plan in advance.

Funny parenting tweet.

At the airport...

Shoutout to all the parents who're ruining their teens' life by making them wear weather appropriate clothing.

Just texted my teenager to remind me what Parental Control password I'd set & that she'd figured out, so I could get into my own Netflix.

According to my teenage sons the appropriate number of squirts of Axe Body Spray is somewhere between 38 and 579.

Can anyone recommend a good wine that pairs well with a teenager's shitty attitude?

Teen tried to make a dramatic exit by slamming my door, but there was a towel on the knob. No slam, & no dignity for her as I died laughing.

Teenagers...

Be kind to strangers.

Son turned 13 yesterday.

Struggling teen.

Whenever my teen cleans his room, I get a brand new set of dishes.

Nothing makes me more nervous than a text from my teenage son that says, "How soon will you and mom be home?"

True that.

Before and after teens.

"My stomach hurts" is teenager for "I have a test in geometry".

How is it that my teenager feels free to scroll through my phone, check out my entire camera roll and read every last one of my text messages, but has a literal stroke if I make eye contact with her lock screen?

Spend quality time with your kids. Force them hold your hand and skip with you. Do this with your teens. Do it at the mall.

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13 Comments

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  1. Apparent November 25, 2019

    I don’t have any teens. Where can I get one?

  2. Kniis November 25, 2019

    @Apparent: You can always just get a cat instead.

  3. Anonymous November 25, 2019

    Just stick to a cat

  4. PV November 25, 2019

    I got through 3 teenage boys. They’re all adults now which is good. However, by the time I finished with the third tern my hair was mostly gone. . . Any correlation?

  5. Mr Bleak November 26, 2019

    @Apparent Local schools will have plenty – but take a big net, they travel in packs.

  6. Thankful November 26, 2019

    Gawd bless all those reckless, hell bent people who are insane enough to have some of those little monsters

  7. Mary November 27, 2019

    Well, went you plan to pick him up a bit earlier from school, he got dentist appointment..and when he released is going to miss only 30 mins. Class…well…not going to dentist now, have to be morning appointment….Gosh…what’s in his brain ???

  8. Shemp November 27, 2019

    ^^^@Mary – Can you please translate that into English for us?

  9. Tony Luxton November 27, 2019

    @Shemp: I got this. I’ll ask her to translate.

    Mary, Bloggage from the grale beyonders, here. Sprinkly wise worms all tricklyhow in the earloders of the human specie. Gratifole to an anonyloppers living human beel for transcrile your worms.

  10. Shemp November 27, 2019

    @Tony Thank you!

  11. Mother of the Year November 27, 2019

    One of my teens hasn’t quite figured out teen rebellion yet. When I picked her up from school, she told me she refused to take a homework sheet that she was told to do. She was not thinking through that I would turn the car back around and take her back to get it. She apparently thought she had a winning argument to convince me how stupid the assignment was. She was so mad at me when we went back, but she had ratted herself out. Had she waited an hour to tell me, the school would have been closed and there would have been no way of getting it, lol. Teens are funny sometimes.

  12. jorge Espinha November 28, 2019

    I can’t wait . I have three boys. Just boys. Oldest is 11. I just can’t wait. I think I hated teenagers when I was a teenager. It’s going to be fine……

  13. Anonymous December 7, 2019

    Jorge, you’re lucky, the annoyance ratio is 5 to 1 girls to boys. The worry ratio is at least 8 to 1 and can go higher, depending on the girl.

Leave Name blank to comment as Anonymous.