A Can of Whoop Ass

Still have some extra cash left after spending stupid amounts of money on dehydrated water in a can? Consider bringing your threats to fruition by literally opening up a can of whoop ass on somebody! This thing comes with a highly detailed and informative label complete and a list on ingredients that include “large caliber bullets” and “napalm”.

Open it!

The manufacturer claims that this one is extra strength and is the only true and original can of whoop ass (US Trademark # 85218295) that’s crafted by artisans with the finest materials. We, however, think that it’s bullshit, and they just want to make quick money by making these in Chinese sweatshops. Also it seems that they’ve gone out of business, since the GetWhoop.com is down. Almost makes you think that selling useless stuff isn’t the best business model…

A can of whoop ass.

The full list of ingredients goes like this: extract of Clint, bull whips, gunpowder, chewing tobacco, large caliber bullets, napalm, jet fuel, yellow die #5, various irritants.


This practical item is available on Amazon, and comes with no guarantee whatsoever.

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