If I Could Use Photoshop in Real Life…

Crossing a river would be really easy

I could easily calm a crying baby

Transportation of heavy furniture would be a pleasure

Avoiding problems with cops would be easier

I wouldn’t get into trouble with angry husbands

I’d put funny mustaches on intimidating people

I’d be rich!

I’d clone-stamp-tool-away mustard stains on my shirt

Repainting walls would take less than 2 seconds

I’d cure stupid people

Original idea by cracked.com or somethingawful.com (not sure who was the first, really).
Remake by sadanduseless.com (obviously).