Latvian Jokes

“What is a Latvian joke?” you might be asking. Latvian jokes are short examinations aimed at poking fun at the everyday life of farmers and townsfolk living in a country that’s still suffering from Soviet era isolationism in freezing, war torn country with very little food. Latvian jokes usually work in a reference to a potato and the ever present politburo. Scroll down to see some of the funniest examples.

Two Latvian Look at clouds. One see potato. Other see impossible dream. Is same cloud.

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Why does Latvian man like mashed potatoes? Is crushed like dreams.

Latvian comedian say "What deal with potato?" Latvian crowd not laugh. Comedian squint into darkness to see crowd. There no crowd. All die from malnourish.

Latvian jokes are the best jokes.

One day, Latvian her knock at the door. Man ask "Who is?"...

- Knock, knock. - Who’s there? - Latvian. - Latvian who? - Please open door. Is cold.

Aren't Latvian jokes just the best?

Latvian walk into bar with mule. Bartender say "Why so long face?" Latvian say "I was thinking of my daughter. She has been lay with soldier for potato. Feed baby."

Latvian: is so cold. Everyone: How cold is it? Latvian: Very. Also dark.

Latvian man not see neighbor for many days. He go into house to see how is. neighbor frozen to death. Man very happy. Family eat well for many weeks now.

Don't you just love Latvian jokes? They are so cheerful!

Latvian jokes are the best jokes!

Question: What are one potato say other potato? Answer: Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato?

Question: What is happening if you cross Latvian and potato? Answer: This is cruel joke. please, no more.

Latvian girl is say, "I want go America one day." Father say, "I send you America." Daughter is thank father. Make tears of happy. Father use for salty potato. Father think moment, say, "Daughter, I no send you America." Potato is more salt.

Man in field is search potato. See one and happy. Turn out actually is rock. Is very starving so eat anyway.

Two Latvian Look at Clouds. Whole sky is clouds. Weather is bad. Latvian are cold.

Latvian farmer grow many potatoes with son. Secret police then take potatoes away. Farmer wake up and think "Of course just dream. Son is dead."

Latvia jokes funny. Man laugh. Then soldier kill man and take potato. Man sad again.

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13 Comments

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  1. Latvian March 26, 2019

    WTF? I am a Latvian and I don’t know who and why wrote these but I can tell you these are not Latvian jokes.

  2. Anonymous March 26, 2019

    Me too Latvian, hate secret Police, have 2 Potato very happi

  3. Anonymous March 26, 2019

    Funny how the Latvians who wrote these jokes could find these beautiful stock images on which to use ROFLBOT to add English text, and still not lose their accent.

  4. Anonymous March 26, 2019

    Maybe it’s a kind of awareness raising about the poeple who were deported to Siberia by communists? Otherwise… Weird? And I don’t know any Latvian whose english is that poor.

  5. Anonymous March 26, 2019

    Latvian is very good English. Joke is bad. Not laugh.

  6. Andris, one of them Latvians March 26, 2019

    Any joke goodly, which laughter causes. No reality to connection, still, specific mood and imagery present, good universe for jocularity making, laugh, laugh.

    Something like this :)

  7. PotatosAreFromAmerica March 27, 2019

    This guy started the Latvian joke thing. He spent a couple of years here during his peace corps mission, and started these jokes on his blog: https://bit.ly/1ktF2oZ
    Some are funny. But timing for this post is bad, exactly 70 years ago in this day thousands of intelligent and wealthy Latvian families were sent with cargo trains to Siberia by Russian communists, communist regime caused what the original joke author later saw in Latvia during early 90’s.

  8. Anonymous March 27, 2019

    Im from Latvia, and most of this stuff is hillarious.. :D
    Some ppl should learn not to be offended.. :D

  9. Rober May 3, 2019

    So these remind me of “Polock” jokes; cruel false narrative making fun of an ethnic stereotype but with a added bad accent twist. Probably NOT made by Latvians.

  10. Anonymous May 9, 2019

    I like the salt one lol

  11. Someone from Latvia June 27, 2019

    You call them jokes? Come on! And Latvian jokes?
    Wtf

  12. Einārs July 11, 2019

    Im Latvian and im not offended, not a single bit, these jokes are brilliant. Of course they are very dark and 100% false, but still.. :D

  13. jeremiah August 5, 2019

    Einārs … do you have potato?

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