People Share Really Dumb Epiphanies They’ve Had In Life

You ever realize something waaayyy too late in life and you feel kind of dumb about it? These Twitter users were nice (and brave) enough to go on record with their admittedly dumb epiphanies. Scroll down to read them all feel much better about yourself.

I thought Arson was a guy. The news would say "Arson is suspected." And I was like, "Another one?!? They gotta catch this guy!"

I didn't know baby carrots came from full size carrots until very recently.

I was astonished to find out RECENTLY that a scotch ordered "neat" meant without ice. I previously thought that meant please don't spill anything.

I thought money laundering was physically washing the money and hanging it to dry to get cocaine residue off of it. A whole room of people silently stared at me after I announced this.

I thought artichoke hearts were from an animal that I pictured as being similar to an armadillo. I thought it was friggen disgusting that people would buy a jar of that.

The little arrow on the side of the gas indicator on your car's dashboard points to which side the tank is on.

I also thought the Batman logo was just yellow teeth. I wondered when he'd open his mouth to show everyone those yellow gnashers.

I didn't realise the numbers on the toaster dial meant minutes. I always thought they referred to levels of toastiness. Took me 48 years to learn this basic truth.

Breakfast was breaking the fast.

When someone told me "Why did chicken cross the road?" "To get to the other side." was not just a pointless non-joke but was instead morbid humor where the chicken reaches "the other side" when it is killed on the road.

OH! Every map of the US (like the one below) led me to believe that Alaska was right next to Hawaii and I didn't learn til last week that Alaska is no where NEAR the other states.

Took me 7 books and 8 movies to realize that Diagon Alley is a play on the word "diagonally" in Harry Potter.

Pennies are brown so I used to think Abraham Lincoln was black. It wasn't until Obama was going to be the first black president that i realized Lincoln wasn't.

I use to think "bereaved" was a last name, so when someone would say "Pray for the Bereaved family" i would always think "Why is something always happening to the Bereaveds?!"

Before filling up my car's gas tank, I'd calculate how many gallons I had room for and stood at the pump so I could make sure to remove the nozzle before my tank overflowed. It wasn't until a v recent camping trip that I learned the pump will auto-shutoff when the tank is full.

The old Milwaukee Brewers logo (the glove) was in the shape of an M and a B. an idiot.

Found out sometime in my 20's that narwhals aren't mythical creatures but are actually real.

How old were you when you realized the word tag in the game TAG stands for "Touch and Go"? I was today years old.

The Beatles. Never even noticed that it wasn't spelled "Beetles". Then it dawned on me "ohhhhh because beats and music and *facepalm*". This happened *way* too recently.

Pickles are cucumbers. I'd just never even thought about it before... well, way too late in life to know this elementary fact.

6 thoughts on “People Share Really Dumb Epiphanies They’ve Had In Life”

  1. Sadly, ‘tag’ was played in the British Isles way before people were generally literate. You ‘tag’ something/one to mark it, which is why you have ‘tags’ on clothes, etc.

  2. It wasn’t until late in high school that I realized the word “ingenuity” meant “very smart/brilliant”. Up until then I actually thought it meant “smart, like an ‘Injun’ (Native American)”. Yup. Me heap big ignoramus. *sigh*

  3. My Neice grew up wondering how was it possible that Alaska’s Eastern coastline was so straight….Also thought Alaska was an island.

  4. Ignorance is rife and that “tag” thing is BS as is the chicken crossing the road interpretation.

  5. ima be so mad if none of yall know the truth about the ring around the rosie song

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