People Sharing The Funniest Nicknames They’ve Ever Heard

A nickname can be incredibly funny or cruel, ridiculous or cynical. If it’s spot on, it sticks and you will never be able to get rid of it. @NoContextBrits Twitter account asked one simple question: “What’s the best nickname you’ve ever heard?” The thread instantly went viral collecting a real treasure trove of human wit. Featured below are the best answers.

Have a friend that we call the "exorcist"..... because he never leaves a party till all the spirits are gone!

I read one recently about somebody knowing a guy called Antony at work and he was only 5ft tall so his nickname was "Shetland Tony"

One of my friend's school teachers named Brian had a glass eye, so they called him Bran - Brian without the i.

Guy in my wife’s work had the nickname Hip Hip...

Soup . His brother was Stew and he wasn't as thick

Arber Xhekaj, a hockey player on the Montreal Canadiens, has the nickname "wifi" because his name looks like a password.

Richard Hibbard nicknamed Fatrick Swayze.

Mate of mines work, woman joined the department and had same first name as lady already working there. She became known as Sequel.

I used to call a girl at work "Krackov". Her name was Dawn.

We called our bass player who was always late for gigs after we’d set all the gear up “Turkish Slipper” as he turned up at the end.

Got a lad at work we call ‘Sting’ … reason being that he is always asking for the police. Another one is ‘Blister’ as he shows up after the hard work’s been done.

Dulux. For a bloke who used to wear two coats when it was cold

I’ve got the nickname ‘Dyson’. A bowel operation left me with a colostomy bag. After seven months I had an operation to reverse it and so became bagless.

A teacher in my school had his two middle fingers severed by a machine. Everyone called him Spiderman

I got called Ringo for a bit, because in our car to work there was a John, a Paul, and a George, then me

Wayne Bruce - Man Bat

Fitter we use to work with use to just stand there and watch others doing the work just casting a shadow.....so we called him Sundial

Laptop...for a Police Officer who was a bit on the short side...he was a small PC!

A vertically challenged school janitor in Coatbridge was known as "Janny De Vito"

Twin brothers played cricket for Australia, Mark and Steve Waugh and in Shane Warnes book he said they called Mark, 'Korean War' because he was known as "the forgotten waugh' as Steve Waugh had a far superior career

A guy in work has a mum who also worked there and her name is Eve! I heard him referred to as ‘Laurent’ (Eves Son Laurent)

Played football with a guy we called Tampax cause he was usually only in for a week and out for 3 !

I used to call my hermit friend ‘the Olympic torch’ cos he never went out.

Lad at the pub has a limp, he’s called the “snipers nightmare”

12 thoughts on “People Sharing The Funniest Nicknames They’ve Ever Heard”

  1. I have carried a Teddy Bear around (for my daughter when we were in the finishing?line of the pregnancy), and my name happens to be Ben, so everyone called me Mr. Ben.

  2. My nickname is Toppy, given by my Grandma who sang a song to me when I was a baby with something about a top in it. I’m now 81 years old and many people don’t know that my real name is Ruth. I have a name book of funny names and nicknames that I’ve collected for years. Fun hobby.

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  3. When he was little, my nephew heard his Mom and Dad refer to the neighbor lady as “fruity” so that’s what he called her and the nickname stuck. (To be fair, she was a little fruity.)

  4. Worked with a chap named Harold Weiner who was referred to as Harry Weiner. I’ll leave the rest to your imagination.

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  5. had a friend named harry. he insisted everyone call him yogi. when i asked him why he said “you date my sister, you figure it out”. her name was sandy bush, his as harry bush…hahahahaha

  6. I had a friend who I randomly found a curse word to use for their name every time I addressed him, because in 6th grade our teacher cursed him out for making his Kahoot username “Curse_Word”. Pretty ironic, honestly.

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