Album Covers That Tried To Look Sexy, But Failed Miserably

While looking through bad album cover designs, we noticed how some of the cover models must have thought how goddamn hot they looked or that the persona they chose for themselves was one of pure sex and charisma and they just had to share it with the world… and we’re glad they did because now we have something to laugh about.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

Tried to look sexy, failed miserably.

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67 Comments

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  1. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    I dunno, Saveta is quite hot!

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  2. Dr. Miguelito Loveless January 11, 2020

    The Gunther album is parody, as the guy deliberately adopted a sleazy persona for his “hit” song, “You Touched My Tra-la-la (My Ding-ding Dong)”

    The Spaghetti album was a parody of a Herb Albert & The Tijuana Brass album called “Whipped Cream & Other Delights “.

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  3. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    Saveta looks likes she’s wearing some of those wooly chaps.

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  4. Debby January 11, 2020

    I had that Orleans album.

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  5. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    Even if a couple are parodies, that leaves many with no excuse!

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  6. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    I think Herbie Mann’s album contains a boner track.

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  7. Deborah Harry January 11, 2020

    all i can say is..christ women were turned on by these mugs back in the day?..oh Mother never speak to me again you tragic wench..!

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  8. Jjoel January 11, 2020

    Pat Coopers album “Spaghetti Sauce and other delights was a parody of Herb Albert album Wh
    Whipped Cream & other delight. I had both albums, LOL

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  9. koen verriest January 11, 2020

    orleans got more than 500000 followers on spotify

  10. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    Kevin Rowland was Dexy’s Midnight Runners (Come on Eileen)

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  11. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    Gunther was meant to be a joke

  12. MM2k January 11, 2020

    Everyone of these are thinking: “I’m on a love train that is never derailing.”

  13. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    they’ve given me the right horn

  14. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    I like Manowar

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  15. Anonymous January 11, 2020

    Carlos has one impressive dolphin…

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  16. Magnus January 11, 2020

    “I’d rather fight than swish” :-o

  17. MaryBeth January 11, 2020

    I own that Herbie Mann album. I bought it at a Goodwill, it was supposed to be the second place prize in our semi-annual epic game night (because second place is the #1 loser, and must be rewarded appropriately). I took it out of the sleeve and played it to see ic there were any skips, and y’all, THE MUSIC WAS SO GOOD, I kept the album. FYI, Duane Allman plays on the album. 😂😂😂

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  18. Gary Getting Down to Business January 11, 2020

    Holy crap MaryBeth, you’re right! I checked it out after I read your comment… wow! What a great album.

  19. loanly January 11, 2020

    Man o war…..wow, too hot! Sizzling!

  20. Bye Now January 12, 2020

    So gross. I think I just threw up a little…

  21. David January 12, 2020

    Kevin Rowland never could make up his mind on what direction to take his music. Dexy’s had the potential of becoming a great ska band .

  22. MicG January 12, 2020

    I wonder if Hans Edlet is aware that he has gynecomastia.

  23. Elaine January 12, 2020

    I found a 1976 album called ‘Too Much Rock’n’Roll’ by Australian band Rabbit that would give these a run for their money – google it :)

  24. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    I am surprised not to see any Heino.

  25. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Gary was the absolute best. I threw back my head and laughed. I thi k he must have been intentionally weird though.

  26. i hate hairy broads January 12, 2020

    that broad with the hairy legs…..yikes!!

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  27. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    music to massage your marte i actaully think is prety sext

  28. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Tino was cute, and we have got that Manowar album: good band!

  29. Trey Evitt January 12, 2020

    This certainly gives “Cringe Gospel Album Covers” a run for its money. Some I’ve seen before by my favorite new discovery has to be, “Shut Up And Dance…Dance Before the Police Come!”

    Was that the short-live drama of Gangsta Disco???? Please, Internet gods, let this be on YouTube.

  30. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Vincent needs to rethink those nuclear shorts….

  31. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Quim barrieros? His mom named him after her lady parts……

  32. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Ok, there are all those crazys from the East Block or South America you never heard of before. And than there is Kevin Roland from the Dexy’s Midnight Runners, a hero of my youth. I don’t mind, he has his coming out or wotever, but the music is sooo horrible … I’m sad.

  33. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Gunther is a parody album.

  34. Doug January 12, 2020

    Carlos looks nice! I like him.

  35. Squirrel January 12, 2020

    Why is no one talking about the side 🥜 on Vincent?! 😂

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  36. Al January 12, 2020

    Rick Grossman was stabbed to death by his son :(

  37. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Quim Barreiros is a popular portuguese comedy-like musician whose lyrics are all about sexual innuendos

  38. Mark January 12, 2020

    That Orleans album is one of the best you’ll ever hear! Still the One is in this.. and all the songs are that good. Enjoy& you’re welcome!

  39. Fastlane January 12, 2020

    Cocaine’s a hell of a drug

  40. dm10003 January 12, 2020

    Carlos and Orleans are actually extremely sexy. Is the writer scared of all hairy chests?

  41. MDinNC January 12, 2020

    That Orleans album is awesome!

  42. Rob January 12, 2020

    lf l could just own one [for the cover] it would be Gary [Getting down to business.]

  43. B.D.E. January 12, 2020

    Why is Manowar.. in this? I loved when they used to wear the Viking outfits. Very hot.

  44. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Nightmare inducing!

  45. cate January 12, 2020

    I owned the Herbie Mann album and it was amazing, cover notwithstanding (although, he looks better than most, by far).

  46. Ben January 12, 2020

    Yes! The days when chest and back hair were still sexy and ultra macho!

  47. MooseK January 12, 2020

    The Pat Cooper album cover is genius.

  48. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Actually the lead singer of Orleans, John Hall (front and center) was a Congressman in upstate New York.

  49. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    None of them ever matured properly 👀😳🙄😱🤔

  50. Anonymous January 12, 2020

    Kevin Rowland was the lead singer in Dexy’s Midnight Runners.

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