“Got Toddlered” Instagram Account Shows Parents Before And After Kids

Parenting: it takes everything out of you. Everything. That’s the gist behind @GotToddlered, an Instagram account that humorously shows the many things toddlers have ruined in their parents’ lives. Scroll down for the funniest examples and let this post be a reminder to use birth control!

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

Before and after kids.

28 thoughts on ““Got Toddlered” Instagram Account Shows Parents Before And After Kids”

  1. These are hilarious but having a kid was the best thing I did. Every day is bloody awesome.

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  2. Being a parent is the most exhausting, draining, emotional, selfless, unrelenting things you can do. It also happens to be one of the most rewarding, satisfying, important things we can do as human beings.
    The sad thing about these pics is that they are being used to sum up an entire, decades-long experience with a fraction of the whole.

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  3. Going from a young adult to a parent is hard for most. You leave the most selfish part of your life and enter the most selfless in an instant.

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  4. So basically you’re showing photos of people with and without their makeup. It’s like those romantic American films of an unpopular ugly girl who loses her glasses and suddenly becomes a playboy model. Only backwards.

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  5. When I was in my 20’s, my then fiancee and I had a couple of “Oops!” times when the condom would break. She did miss her period for a few weeks following. My thoughts at that time were “I’m going to be a PAPA!!!”, and I felt so HAPPY. We parted a year later.

    Then I turned 30. Realized I was gay. Came out. Met a lesbian couple who were interested in me being a surrogate to provide the seed for a second child for them. I was cool with that. Never got past the preliminary discussions. They eventually separated.

    I hit 50. My husband took me to Disney World for my birthday. Two older, gay men among a sea of baby carriages and screaming toddlers. Not… a… good… mix.

    Now at 60, I look at parents and all I can think of is “Augh! Keep you walking coughing snot-bag spawn away from me.” Can’t stand them; don’t want them, don’t want to be around them.

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  6. That 1st Mom and her baby look too much like Cheyenne Harris and her 4 month old son Sterling who died of a severe diaper rash, malnutrition and dehydration (gross neglect). I truly hope the Mother and son in this article are merely dopplegangers.

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  7. Now if they could all understand that their lives have changed; that they shouldn’t go out and ruin everyone else’s adult fun with their screaming, shitting accessories draped over arms like the newest designer handbags- showing them off to anyone that glances their way.

    If a parent’s toddler isn’t properly trained to adhere to social expectations in shared spaces that are not designated for child rearing, that parent shouldn’t be unnecessarily subjecting the general public they encounter with the consequences of their choice to procreate and bring an untrained child to a public space.

    Changing/leaving a diaper in a public space that isn’t designated for doing so should be considered criminal bioterrorism, and all involved in the criminal acts should be subject to immediate and summary public execution.

    Parents can be mad; but if the kid doesn’t know how to go out in public without screaming, without shitting its pants, without touching everything, without groping/biting people, and to cover when they cough/sneeze; then they should be handled like a dangerous animal- with a leash and muzzle.

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  8. Looks like karma to me. You choose to be selfish and bring new life into this already decaying world? Now you and your mental state will be the first things to decay.

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  9. Having kids is not the most selfless thing you can do, for the idiots claiming as such. It would, in fact, be one of the most selfish things you can do. Adoption is selfless. But no, you don’t wanna adopt cuz it MUST be your DNA. Making it 1/999999999999 reasons why it’s selfish.

    Not only that, but having kids doesn’t automatically make you more responsible OR more mature. For anyone claiming as such… where are your brain cells? It’s a pity that it took a child for you to mature and finally be responsible, and even more of a pity that you project your tragic and self-inflicted experience onto others. Unlike y’all, it didn’t take a kid for me to finally be mature and responsible. I’m better than that, and know better than to pop out kids while still “immature” and “irresponsible”.

    Creampies don’t make you selfless, don’t make you mature, and they don’t make you any more responsible than someone without kids. Y’all are on crack.

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  10. I find all the brainwashed comments hilarious.. ‘I was sh** on, spit on, disrespected, but it was sooooo wuuuuurf it’.

    EVery single one has this little coda: lists all the kid crap and then ends it ‘but it was …’… I see NOTHING enticing about kids. I see NO reason to give everything up for just a mini me dna spin off. And it is more than just make up (to the morons who are pissed off because they bought the lie about parenthood). Children destroy lives and relationships. It is what they do. Perhaps it can be weathered. There is just no reason for it.

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  11. Children destroy hopes, dreams, marriages, lives, etc. and I’m so happy I’m physically unable to have them in this world. We only get one life and this horror is no way to live it.

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  12. Imagine having a child, couldn’t be me, good luck with the expensive meat sack you made that will be with you for at least 16 years lmao you took a big L.

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  13. Someone from r/childfree has shared this article to there sub a week ago now. This article’s comment section has definitively been brigaded by them. Especially with how the most aggressively anti child comments date to when the post was shared, and how the pro parenting comments have been disliked to oblivion. Someone really needs to contain those crazies.

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  14. …away all your time, energy, money, health, sleep, etc. etc. I always knew I never wanted them, but as far back as I remember, everyone was trying to brainwash me with the idea that I was going to pop out lots of babies, I had no choice in the matter. In high school I saw so many girls stupidly throwing their lives away, getting pregnant, dropping out of school etc. My family treats me like the black sheep, because I graduated college and am making something of my life which somehow makes me less worthwhile than all my siblings and cousins who are selfishly spawning like there’s no tomorrow. I don’t care, I’m so glad I didn’t mindlessly follow the herd.

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  15. It’s very funny on what people can write with the protection of an anonymous screen. The comments here are very evident of this.

  16. Lol, look at all of this immature, incoherent screeching in the comment section months later. I too am from r/childfree, and the brigading is ridiculous.

    Yes, children would ruin the lives of ***CHILDFREE*** people. Because they’re childfree. Kids would ruin my life personally, but they don’t ruin everybody’s lives. All of the parents I know absolutely love their lives.

    I feel like it’s good for us to step outside of our bubble and realize that everyone deserves to lead the life they want. Coming into these comments and screeching about how parents are delusional or some shit like that is immature and absolutely bizarre.

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