Brilliant Cross Stitches

When you think of cross stitch, you probably think of Bible quotes hanging off the walls at your grandma’s house. There’s nothing wrong with that, but for those of you who want a little more from your embroidery, check out these hilariously brilliant examples.

Warning: this is proof I have the patience to stab something 1,000 times.


My drug of choice is the love I get from Jesus. Just kidding, it's weed.

Life is harder than my nipples.

When work feels overwhelming, just remember that you're going to die.

Families are meant to be tight.

Damn, it feels good to be a gangster.

For fox sake.

I will shit on everything you love.

Wake the baby and I'll cut you.

Please don't do coke in the bathroom.

Please don't make yourself at home. I've seen how you live.

Calm your tit. Just one tit.

Mothers of teenagers know why animals eat their young.

This is how I like my eyelashes.

Brilliant cross stitch.

You're not drinking alone if your cat is home.

It's not a crack house. It's a crack home.

My only interests are drinking wine and judging people.

Home is where the fart is.

When life shuts a door, open it again. That's how doors work.



 Add your comment
  1. Anonymous April 10, 2019

    some of these are a little overdone, but i love it!

  2. Anonymous April 13, 2019

    Some are a little cute. Some could get you arrested.

  3. Anonymous April 14, 2019


  4. Anonymous April 20, 2019

    I love them alot, my great grandma has tried to recreated some!She is having lots of fun :)

  5. Anonymous May 1, 2019


  6. Anonymous August 11, 2019

    This made me laugh, they are awesome, I love them. :)

  7. Anonymous November 30, 2019

    Where can I get these?

  8. Anonymous July 10, 2020

    Me. Want. All. The. Things. Now!

Leave Name blank to comment as Anonymous.